Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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