I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
