Can Purell be used as lube?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
