You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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