You made me cry and you don't even care
Michael Bay diarrhea
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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