people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
