i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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