i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
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