She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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