Kiss
Puke
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
