I think im going to throw up on grandma
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
where are my eyebrows?
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