is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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