I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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