No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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