Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
