is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
