I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize