what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
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You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize