where am i from again
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize