I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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