i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
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