i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
