Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
