okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
