we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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