She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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