Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (386): Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him http://tfl.nu/2ppo
  Replies (23) Good night (5965) Bad night (987)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even. http://tfl.nu/24fg
  Replies (13) Good night (5787) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back http://tfl.nu/8662
  Replies (14) Good night (5026) Bad night (1246)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas. http://tfl.nu/cqgv
  Replies (23) Good night (4643) Bad night (1373)
• Favorite

  (247): View more from

  Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (247): Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me. http://tfl.nu/wk5w
  Replies (11) Good night (1015) Bad night (4403)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/ddwi
  Replies (9) Good night (3746) Bad night (1155)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am http://tfl.nu/badm
  Replies (4) Good night (1721) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader http://tfl.nu/1luq
  Replies (6) Good night (1041) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house http://tfl.nu/5tya
  Replies (7) Good night (1158) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen. http://tfl.nu/pgtg
  Replies (3) Good night (2053) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really. http://tfl.nu/n2d1
  Replies (14) Good night (2784) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this. http://tfl.nu/t3uy
  Replies (1) Good night (364) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today. http://tfl.nu/qos3
  Replies (3) Good night (509) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate. http://tfl.nu/tke3
  Replies (5) Good night (939) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her http://tfl.nu/c5p9
  Replies (4) Good night (577) Bad night (266)

Randomize