he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
she peed on how many people?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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