Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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