Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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