hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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