I just made out with a guy for $7.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
