btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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