Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
