i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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