If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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