Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
