She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
