Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
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