i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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