She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
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