He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
