glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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