these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
