they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
