Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
