I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Someone shattered a urinal.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize