The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
# Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
29 Super Simple DIY Drinking Games
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it