like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
The 19 Creepiest Missing Person Cases
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night