anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
