you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
